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Living By The Seat Of My Pants

by Marjorie Newton

in My Thoughts, Recovering Housewife, Welcome To My Blog ·

Doing Things My Way

My Mother and Me

Before I continue my journey into the depths of my “life’s lessons and amazing philosophies,” I must warn you that my story will not exude brilliantly clever sentences and earth shaking paragraphs found in New York Times best sellers. Neither Ernest Hemmingway’s short pithy, emotionally packed nor Dorothy Parker’s darkly morbid but humorous styles, even though my favorite authors, will not be slipping into my very simple direct way of writing. You see, I don’t fancy myself a “writer” or an “author,” great, good or kinda good, and frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn!  (Ho Ho!) I just want to be free of all the rules editors, agents and publishers insist upon.  Once when writing a short book, a love story, my editor, a well know author, suggested I change the ending to my story.  Astonished, I refused, pointing out that then it would not be MY story.  I want to be free to tell my story, my own way, with my own mistakes, my own rules, and have my own fun doing it.

So, you see, I am just a woman who has lived many years (yes, I am now officially “old” even though I refuse to be “old”) who is loaded with an enormous amount of creative energy that insists on reaching out to the world for fulfillment.  My best friend and husband died almost seven years ago, and no longer can I hide behind “being his wife” as an excuse for not “going for it.” I must say I feel a little cheated out of the opportunity to be that incredible person who might have changed the world or at least made it better.  Sister Theresa beat me to it.  Even so, I have done some good things through all the years of volunteer work, especially in my daughter’s schools, her many other activities and some politics.  But as important as those jobs were, they never seemed to satisfy that hunger lurking inside, that hunger that many years ago warned my mother that one day her funny little farm girl daughter from Wisconsin would write a book.

In many ways, my mother whom I adored and idealized as a child and would do anything to make happy and proud, probably, ironically, stood in the way of my climbing over and pushing through those Victorian mores.  I am sure she appreciated my various abilities, but wanted me happily, securely married and living nearby, and if I had gone to college as I dreamed of doing (and did do several years later) that probably would not have happened.  But there were women of my era who had the courage to break through those Victorian chains and burst forward into their lives.  I secretly wanted to be one of them but I was my mother’s “good girl.”  Stay at home or have a career.  Those were my options, I thought, and to be a mother was far too important to me.  I desperately wanted to have a daughter, yes, even as much as I had always wanted to desperately please my mother.

The turbulent sixties gave us woman a gift, an opportunity to finally see ourselves not just in the home.  To some extent young women still struggle with career/stay-at-home conflict because to do both can be difficult.  The mores of our culture are slowly making it an easier situation for our young woman though and as a result we see far more women in the decision making positions in business, medicine, education and politics.  We see women who have the guts to be out there showing their brilliance, courage, integrity and intelligence, and ignoring the comments of dismay from the Good Old White Boy Club who would prefer they return to the kitchen.  And to that I say, too bad, guys!  Not going to happen! And WHOOPIE! LOOK OUT PATRIARCHY!  HERE WE COME!

I am not sure when I wrote this poem.  I really don’t consider myself a poet but from time to time I have indulged! 

AN ODE TO LOVE AND PEACE

I want my life to be worthwhile

But I really don’t have much time…

To do or write something special

And I’m not talking a nursery rhyme!

I’d like to change the world, you see

Which surely makes me wonder

How shall I go about that task

It’s much too much to ponder!

Not the usual “peace on earth”

Or let the angels sing…

And not the “love they neighbor” bit

And all those usual things!

We’ve done all that, it hasn’t worked

We must try something new…

Because down deep the answer lurks

“The” answer untried but true.

Let’s put down the guns and knives

Quit fighting with all our might!

And trust we can live equal lives

Equal power to all alike!

Enough of the wars to be on top

Talking tough to look real cool!

We must know by now that “that’s” a flop!

What happened to the Golden Rule?

So, let’s give a hug and give a kiss

And maybe then we’ll find real bliss

And then we’ll laugh and then we’ll dance

And this time, let’s give love a chance!

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Hi Marjorie,
    It’s always so nice to see another person sharing your own believes. Knowing, that your own daughter is carrying your spirit, and having cuddled your granddaughter, the tiny little bird, who is growing into this beautiful spirited young girls, tells m e you’re from my tribe. I’m inspired by women like you, because I can’t believe either sometimes, how rich my life experience is. I am so glad I’m a woman, mother, grandmother. Yes!

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